Nightmares

No one likes to experience that feeling of falling, while either awake or asleep. I remember growing up- having the reoccuring dream where I fell off the monkey bars. It was actually re-living something that had happened. I still see it in my minds eye the hands missing, the free falling through the air, the ground rising up to meet me. It happens everytime in my dream/nightmare. Wakes me up everytime too.. right before I hit the dirt. All this is to say that we have entered the land of nightmares where our daughter is concerned. We are in unchartered territory and we don't know the first thing about how to handle it. She is waking up about 4:30 am and will not go to sleep unless we are with her. She'll sleep in our arms but if we lay her down she wakes up and cries until she is sick and gagging or until we come back in. Which we always do. Last night my hubby slept with her in the chair we keep in her room. He was in there for three or so hours, she was out like a light when he put her down and came crawling back to our bed. It the first time we've slept until 10:00 am in eons. I can't remember the last time I slept that late. See I can't sleep when she's crying in the other room. Breaks my heart. Jilts my nerves. Awakens my senses... everything!

So as we push on through uncertain waters... we embrace this time because we know that time is quickly passing. My little girl will only need me for so long. I want to be there everytime she needs me.